This Saturday I ran eleven miles in the morning with my friend, Kelli, because we are training for a half marathon in a few weeks. After our run, we graced a local coffee shop with our sweaty presence and kindly took our drinks and muffins out of doors where we climbed on large rocks next to the sea and watched surfers, boaters, and parasailers. The deep blue waves beat against our rocks, receding as white foam. The sky's thick clouds hovered low, and the blue horizon tempted me to wonder, "Is this real? Am I really here?" How supremely wonderful of the Lord to allow me to live and minister His glorious gospel on such a lovely island.
Have you ever felt like you know the answers, but it's not enough? Slowly I'm learning that the glorious reality of God is that He is not just in the business of handing out truth like pamphlets or fliers, like, "Here's some truth; read it and catch ya later." It's so much greater than that.
You see, He IS the truth. His arms embrace the most inward part of who I am, giving me courage, true courage. Our faith is not all about feelings, for feelings can be deceptive. I desire to lead my feelings, rather than be led by them. But sometimes, you just FEEL a certain way. You may know the truth, but you still FEEL a certain way that denies the truth to which you cognitively give credence. That's where His love comes in...that still small voice...and His presence. Just let me be with You, Lord.
He does satisfy. I used to dream of being this woman who never felt worried and never doubted God, the kind of woman who just glowed with Jesus and never felt frustrated. But it seems that perhaps He doesn't desire me to be some sort of SuperChristian Woman flying around, invincible to emotions. Perhaps He desires me to simply be HIS woman, without the muscles, cape, and cheesy smile. Maybe instead of Super Woman, I'm supposed to be willing to be the damsel in distress, and confidently wait on Him as my Hero, my Rescuer. Oh, I know He has already saved my soul, praise His Name! But you know, there are times when you just need Him to be there in a special way. Hallelujah He is here with me. Thank You, Jesus.
Cry out to Him, dear reader. Surrender your will and your life. Stop trying to be super on your own, and be willing for Him to rescue you. As the apostle Paul spoke of hardships:
"I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
2 Corinthians 12: 7b-10
He's the hero, so throw away the cape and leotard. They look pretty silly, anyway.
3 comments:
Wonderful words, my dear one. We do often find ourselves thinking that the complete Life in Christ is something that we can *achieve*, when it is not about getting out of the storm so much as holding firmly onto His Hand in its midst.
I'm glad you are blogging.
Amen! Amen! Thanks for being real and vulnerable and incredibly brave and bold. I struggle with knowing that He has the capability of healing me, of making me fully whole with only a thought ... so why doesn't He? And yet, in His infinite and perfect wisdom, He guides us and strengthens us through the struggling. It takes greater faith to trust Him through the struggling than if He healed immediantly. I don't like this at all, but I must learn to believe and trust it. :-)
I love reading your words.
LOVE YOU GIRL!!!!! <3
Post a Comment